meditation

A Phase

I commented somewhere recently – I am in a Goddess phase – and I really am. She is on my mind – I even had to write a poem about it. Today, I went down to the forest and, choosing a part of the path deep in the forest where a small stream passes, I called on Her. I lit and placed a small candle and left an offering. She was all around and everywhere. I have periodically dreamed of Her. She is the beautiful woman of my dreams. She is also the deep and strange fears that I harbor deep inside. More importantly, she is the inner me – my anima. She is every woman I meet. She is the temptress, the sexy vixen, the aloof and haughty woman,

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Life is But A Dream

I recall singing that song when I was a small child and wondering what did it mean? – Life is just a dream? Row, row, row your boat, Gently down the stream. Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily, Life is but a dream. But where did this come from and who wrote it? A bit of research suggests that the earliest printing of it was in 1852 but who wrote it and why seems lost in the mists of time. If anyone knows, please let me know… I thought life a dream when I was a child or rather, I thought it a game that I controlled. It was a sort of virtual reality (as it would be called now) and I was sat in a box connected to a machine that

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The Mirage of Duality – I Am A Balance Worker

An article by Cameron Day appears to have caught the esoteric world on fire. Titled “Why I Am No Longer A Lightworker“, this article is well worthy of a read. His thesis basically is that both the dark side and the light side are actually the dark side and that this dualism was created by the evil demiurge to sustain itself through our energy. “What matters most to the demiurge is that we worship it or one of its agents, regardless if they are on the light team or the dark team,” he states. It isn’t the distaste for the dark side that is creating the discussion but his view that the ‘light’ is a false light and that any channeled higher entities and so forth are also following and

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It’s In The Silence

It’s in the Silence So they say The loudness of the quiet day It’s in the Darkness I’ve heard said The brightness shining in my head It’s in the Void I was told And followed deep to behold It’s in the wind So it reads Not in your dry and powdered creeds It’s deep inside I know this You are the sought after bliss Its where you least expect to find it Hidden in plain sight Ears to hear and eyes to see Inside you will find the light

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Magical Practice and Imagination

Sometimes the thought of meditating and conducting what amount to tortuous mental exercises is less than compelling. It takes effort, it is repetitive and you can go for weeks without any meaningful results. But there is no way out. You can’t learn magic from a book! It has to be via hours and hours of practice. Sometimes, I go for days without doing formal exercises instead practicing various things like pore breathing and so on in those moments when I have some time. After a while, I make a renewed effort to get formal again. The plain fact is, its pretty bloody tedious. The biggest part of magic is imagination. You simply have to be able to imagine and to see/feel/hear things that you imagine. One exercise I practice all

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Imagining

Sometimes, in a meditative state, I have some impressions about imagination. I can barely explain in words what these are except to say that I get the strongest idea that if I could truly imagine something as really there, it would be and that this is how everything works. What is even stranger is that I often have a memory of being very young and being able to do this. I haven’t explained very well. I can’t. It is very frustrating though because it is a knowledge and a memory and then it’s gone again. It’s leaving is tinged with the sadness of knowing that I knew this/know this/can do this/did do this but have now forgotten how. I have also experienced this same sense of loss on waking up

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Plumbing

I’m not sure what consciousness is and apparently scientists are clueless too but, I do know that I am conscious – most of the time. Consciousness is associated with the brain – I guess people would argue as to whether the brain is an instrument of consciousness or actually creates the illusion of it. I prefer to believe the former of course. However, if you really think about what we are we are just brains on sticks. The stick is the spine of course but that’s pretty much what we are right? A brain on a stick. The rest of it is plumbing and a sack to hold it all in. The problem is that occasionally, the plumbing goes wrong. It did for me. About 18-months ago, my plumbing had

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The Measurement Problem

As a small boy, I recall quite often thinking and imagining that in reality, I was sat on a chair in a small room looking at a TV screen and controlling myself through a set of knobs and levers in front to me. In this dreamlike imagining, there were rows upon rows of these small rooms or booths each with an occupant managing their virtual life. Remember, I was thinking and dreaming this in the mid 1960’s before color TVs, computers, virtual reality and The Matrix movie. I mentioned this also in Inner Journeys: Explorations of the Soul. Additionally, at that age, I had not widely read any books and quite honestly, other than Watch with Mother, I hadn’t seen much TV either (in black and white on a box-like

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Peter the Roman, Fatima, and The Truth

I am stuck at home sick. Apparently, it is inflammation of the lung so I am miserable because, not only am I under the weather but, I have to quit the cigs! At times like these, I don’t have much energy and resort to browsing the internet mainly because Czech T.V. isn’t much fun. I often end up chasing down topics across the net and last night was no exception. For some reason, I found myself reading about the Fatima children and the three secrets. I started searching on the fact that the Pope is resigning, found all kinds of doomsday nonsense about the Last Pope – Peter the Roman, and from there, went to the Fatima stories. My initial thought, trawling through this material on the web, was good

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The Fool

In Inner Journeys, I took some of my magickal diary extracts and interspersed them through the book for effect and to reinforce the content…. Here is one from the book on The Fool. The Fool seems foolish because he is not limited by rules or conventions – the barriers that we create for ourselves in this world. I say that I can’t do something because I believe that I cannot or I have been told that I cannot but the Fool has no expectations and does whatever. Not knowing that “it cannot be done” he does it anyway. The limitations that we apply to ourselves do not apply to the Fool. This is not to say that natural laws can be broken but that self-limitations do not exist. As the

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