tx

6000 Miles To Texas

6000 miles
It’s a long way to fly
Soaring so high
6000 miles
It was a long jump then
Knowing when
The Atlantic tore us apart
Me and my new start
The three of you stayed
Don’t see you often I’m afraid
Texas seems so far
Cannot get there in my car
Trans Atlantic
Getting frantic
So close and yet so far
The grand ta ta
6000 miles
Endless smiles
Written in ink
Not in the pink
But never mind
In my heart there is no distance at all
No miles to travel
No short inconvenient phone call
No technology to baffle
See you there
See you soon
See you on the dark side of the Moon.

tx

Prostrates – Who Wants Them?

As many men my age will know, prostrate pain is very annoying. It is a low grade pain or soreness that grates on the nerves over time. It causes depression apparently and I can see why. I have suffered from this since my mid 30’s and it is progressively getting worse. The first time was in Houston and I recall being very nervous visiting the doctor but a month of very strong antibiotics sorted it. These days, I take all kinds of herbal remedies and only visit the doctor if it gets to the point it is today – feels like someone gave me a good kicking!

The problem with this little male gland is that its hard to know what is wrong with it. It is full of very small tubules and so an infection might not show up on any tests and antibiotics may never reach the desired point. In many cases, there is no actual infection and the medical people don’t seem to know what the issue actually is. In others the prostrate is enlarged and again, no one seems to know why.

So we suffer on without any real promise of help. We take the herbal supplements in the hope that they do work and we work on healing the gland in meditation. Occasionally, we take copious amounts of antibiotics for a month or more and get a couple of weeks relief. At times, it drives me nuts.

In my case, the prostrate pain is combined with lower back pain. I can tell as soon as I get up in a morning what kind of a day it will be based on the back pain. I have actually been told by one doctor that my prostrate isn’t involved but rather it is a nerve in my back and displaced pain. Yet, the last time I saw my Doctor, he prescribed antibiotics – what for a nerve in my back?

In the end, prostrate pain is something you simply put up with. Perhaps it is a contributing factor in making older men grouchy? It sure is in my case….

s1

alone

Alone

I am alone
Sitting with my memories
Scenes of life pass me by
A tear wells in my eye
It is just me
Talking to me
No one cares
Distinct lack of interest
No one gives a shit
So here I sit
Alone
Talking to myself
Worried about my mental health
I am the performer
The audience too
I clap in tune to the song
That I am singing
Cos no one else cares
Its just me
Alone
Me

alone

pap

Celebrity

I will tell you this
In a moment of honesty
I would love to be your celebrity
Come on you papparazzi
You can follow me
Snap your snaps and invade my privacy
Follow me around in your idiocy
I want to be wanted
I want to be liked
Most of all I want that life
Married to a famous wife
I’ll sign my autograph
Give it on a photograph
I wanna be a star
I wanna go far
I’ll happily be your celebrity
Smile with insincerity
Give my star studded opinion
I want to be in
the in crowd
Cool, I am ice
Even if I’m not so nice
Love me
Follow me
Scream and holler
Its no bother
Want to be your celebrity
Want you to follow me
Wouldn’t that be total fun
Forever on the run
Known everywhere
Eyes stare
Give it to me
I am celebrity

pap

Off To Aston…

I remember being very keen to escape from Hull and Willerby. At age 18, my chance had arrived. I was off to Aston University in Birmingham for 3-years. It wasn’t my family I wanted to escape from it was the place. There was a big world to explore and I wanted to have a fresh start. Be the person that I was instead of the person people thought I was. Back then, Birmingham seemed miles and miles away. The train ride was via Doncaster and Sheffield and it was tremendously exciting…..

Birmingham itself was like a concrete jungle. Aston is near the city center and then it literally was concrete underpasses, concrete walkways, concrete bull ring and … well, it was all so much concrete really! Did I care? Hell no. I loved it there. I opened a bank account at Barclays and for 6-years lived off an overdraft paid off each semester by receipt of my grant monies (Thank you Barclays!). Aston is also like concrete. Huge, massive concrete and brick buildings with high ceilings and six or seven stories. Investment in this new University had however commenced and so there was a new glassy modern library and other buildings going up. The geology department was different. It was situated in what had been a small Victorian house by the library and what can only be termed a long pre-fabricated building (see photo at bottom). It had character.

aston-university

It was a different world back then it really was. No cell phones or computers meant we had to do everything the old fashioned way. It was also safer or I was naive? I would hitch hike home for a weekend. I would just decide Friday afternoon to go home and would set off walking from the city center with my thumb signal. I recall one day a guy in a small red vintage sports car stopped and drove me to Sheffield… that was fun. I always made it in 4-5 hours and would hitch hike back again on the Sunday afternoon….

Of course, it took me a while to understand people in Birmingham. A buzz was, I soon learned, what I might get at a bus stop… for example. It also took me the first year to truly settle in. It wasn’t as easy as I had imagined moving away and living on your own. But by my second year, I was stage manager at Aston Campus Entertainments in the Students Union, on Student Council and I had moved off campus to a flat in west Brom. that I shared with Brendan.

The first night that we moved in we thought we would go for a beer. Down the high street we went and the sound of reggae music ushered us into a pub. We opened the door talking animatedly and walked in. Then there was that moment when we realised that the music had stopped and that, apart from our chatter, there was total silence. We looked up and around. Every single person in that pub was black….. except us. And every single one of them was staring at us. I think we reacted the right way as we decided in for a penny, in for a pound and went to the bar. We ordered a beer. The chattering recommenced, the music came back on and within 30-minutes, Brendan and I were chit chatting away to everyone inside…….It turned out to be a really great place full of great people!

Naive? Probably….. but we had fun.

The Geology class of 1981. Yours truly is top row second from the left…..

astonclass

song-of-life

I Am A Stage

The light shines in my face
The rock n roll is loud here
Guitar screams and bass thunders
Reverberating in my head
Stereo composition drives
The beat is sensual and strong
This is my own made up song
Making it up as I go along
There are no rules
Cos’ rules are for Fools
There are no requirements
Except to entertain
The song in my head
Doesn’t actually exist
And yet that song rocks
I am a stage – a venue
I am all the rage – rocking too
A driving beat moves me
It is the engine of my life
Pumping, thumping along
It’s the heart that drives this song
Making it up as I go along
I can’t do anything wrong
Life throbs and pulses
Mind over matter
Inside over outside
A rock n roll ride
That song inside
Keeps me jiving
I am the Lord of the dance, said He
But, the dance is inside of me
In my heart
Tiphareth rocks
To the song of life

song-of-life

bigstock-Wave-on-the-beach-52761430

Death on the Beach

Sunlight shimmers on churning waters
Sand glitters like gold dust rolling with the waves
An azure sky, brilliant colors brightened
There is a surreal element to this surf
Tumbling over, erosive currents pull
Unreal, it seems to be so unreal
Like a waking lucid dream
Dreamt by this dreamer
Experienced in this place
A moment of time trapped
In my memory forever
So that when I endeavor
To recall
It’s there
Yet again
Like an aging photo
In a photo album
Faded at the edges
Handled too many times
Deeply etched lines
On paper and my face
As the years have passed by
Faster, ever faster
To that ultimate destination
Without silly recrimination
Giving in to the tidal pull
Sand gold swirling around me
Sunlight tuning blue
Dragged away by the tide that brought me
Tumbling over, erosive currents pull
Unreal, it seems so unreal
Life passing away
Into a waking lucid dream
Dreamt by this dreamer
On the other side of life

bigstock-Wave-on-the-beach-52761430