Checkpoints
Once again I find myself sitting here sort of alone. I always seem to end up listening to music and drinking a glass or two of wine. The music these days will be Bush, Gavin Rossdale, Porcupine Tree, Steven Wilson, or one of his other projects…. maybe Riverside or Opeth. Whatever, the music seems to find its place within me and that place is invariably somewhere in the past. It isn’t that I don’t look forward to the future, I do and very much. No, it is simply that I now have 55 years of very precious memories, life’s lessons and many rambling and bizarre thoughts about how to make sense of it all. I have been extraordinarily fortunate in my life. I have packed a couple or more lives
Read More »A Way Back?
The silver image flickers on screen Moving stills still alive now dance A home movie rerun has begun A 1960’s sun hangs high above us The surf churns and works the beach Moments from a childhood now out of reach Blisters painful on my reddened sunburned back The drifting aromas of cuppa soup Whispered and muted parental voices speak The tent gently flutters in the night breeze I shiver and roll and try to sleep Imagined stirrings of a quantum leap The grass sways in golden waves The incessant buzz of insects grind Dragonflies hover like silky silken copters The heat envelopes us within a shimmer A feeling creeps in – one of déjà vu A crack in time that I might climb thro? The surfboard rides and glides easily
Read More »Love Me or Hate Me?
The first review for How To Create Your Own Reality is up… Yes – its a 1-star review that says as its title ‘Awful’. I had to laugh. Hopefully, that won’t turn out to be the majority decision….. I found myself remarking to a friend after seeing the review – ‘why me?’ The reason is that I seem to polarize my audience. Not for me are a bunch of 3 and 4 star ratings…. I seem to get a lot of 5-stars and a few 1-stars with not much in the middle. So my conclusion is that people either love or hate my work. This perception prompted the PhD in me to do some quick analysis….. Well, I was wrong…… its actually a nicely skewed distribution towards 5-stars across 111
Read More »Memories of Another Me?
There are moments when I am overwhelmed with a strange feeling. It’s as if I remember events or things or perhaps hints of events or things that never actually happened. Sometimes, it’s like an ache yearning for something that seems lost or unclear. The feeling that there is something strange about things is a part of this sensation. Bizarre? To be honest, I think it is this feeling that I had as a child that lead me to imagine that I was not really here at all but instead I was sat in a small room hooked up to a machine through which I experienced a virtual life knowing that outside my room was an endless corridor of such rooms…. The feeling sometimes is so strong that I am sad
Read More »The Dead
Somewhere there is a place The dead must go Once here, but now residing Somewhere there Cut off and isolated from the living It used to be called Hades A shadow land full of shadow people And when the sun shines They shimmer like rising heat The dead are fast on their feet Fleet of foot and silent too A higher frequency of life Is that what death truly is? All around us they play Thoughts trapped in the ether And when the light is just right We may gain a glimpse or two A flickering shadow plays Radiating under Sun rays The faint echo of laughter Or a hint of foot steps on ice A face stares back in the mirror A voice speaking starkly From within incandescent static
Read More »Inside is the Outside
Thirty-years counting down If I knew the moment If I could only see That wouldn’t set me free Moments in time Two-dimensional line Eternity viewed through glasses Instants turn out to be flashes Of inspiration No space nor time Inside is the outside Mind is all there really is And everything we do Everything we see Are insignificant moments Computerised torments For this stream In this life-long dream
Read More »Jumping The Queue
Today, I am stood in a queue. I observe that there is a single line for two checks outs and the person at the front of the line selects the check out that first comes free. I am four or five back and I take my position and aimlessly think of nothing. As I get to the front of the line I suddenly think to myself that now it’s just me here, I am sure someone will push past me when the first check out comes free. The thought slipped out before I had a chance to stop it. As soon as it was released I knew….. The guy behind spotting his opportunity jumped in front of me to the left hand check out. I stood there dismayed. Then I
Read More »The Meaning of Life?
There are moments in which I truly despair. Those painful times when my self-confidence seems to disintegrate and I find myself questioning everything. Suddenly, I feel valueless and deeply alone. For all the effort and all the ups and downs of life, what have I really achieved? When I die will anyone really give a damn? How do you measure your worth, your impact on life? It isn’t job titles, or money, houses or cars. Is it a legacy of writings? Probably it is the impact that you made on people and I fear I have had little impact outside of a very small group of people. There is a fear, no a deep seated insecurity at work that says it was a life wasted and time squandered. And yet,
Read More »Do You Think Like A Conspiracy Theorist?
I guess I have a bee in my bonnet about conspiracy theories. I find them funny and those who chose to believe in them interesting. Today, the buzz on the net is all about the sudden and abrupt closing of 5 or 6 Wal-Mart stores across the southern US. The excuse used in all cases is plumbing problems and closed for 6-months. Well, Wal-Mart is the corporate Scrooge of all time and there is no way plumbing problems would close any of their stores – nope. Wal-Mart would do anything to keep its stores open. All of that is true. But what has this set of closings triggered? Well – here is a short list, 1. There is going to be a military exercise in the US in July or
Read More »Silly Season
Even though I haven’t lived in the Uk in over 25-years, I do know what an election there feels like and having spent almost two decades in the US, which the UK now seems to want to emulate in terms of political campaigning, I feel sorry for all of you Brits. The silly season is about to start – has already started. You will now be subjected to a bunch of young, immature and inexperienced men (yes – still mostly men) telling you what you want to hear in order to curry your favor and your vote. Later, once elected, they will forget what they said and do what they want anyway. Isn’t it time to just put an end to this nonsense? In a world I created, this is
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